Sunday, August 06, 2006
Feelin' uncomfortable....
yesterday had SNYO reherasal. not bad. I was having problems allocating the parts. I would like everyone to have equal playing and not have one person do more. still re arranging it....
anyway i sort of heard my composition for like the very FIRST time yesterday. wanted to have a reharsal but nothing could be done. as usual my piece was difficult and my musicians could not handle it. I don't blame them, i guess its just that there is little time left and the heat is on. I am getting sick of my compositions being unplayable and difficult. y can't i write something simple? i feel like giving up but i can't. feel like just not performing my work, but i can't. wish i did not take part. sigh.
Thanks to my musicians who are playing my piece. i appreciate your efforts. =)
i notice that i am starting to get withdrawal symptoms of H. I notice i am gettign further and further apart. i ahte this feeling but it is for the best. I am finding comfort in someonelse but even that i need stop.
YOu wore a mask and talked differently that day, i felt weird that is why i also put on a mask and made you feel weird. be proud of yourself and don't be ruled by the ppl around you but rather be yourself...things flow better....especially conversations. Sorry for my reaction, i was not feeling good about it so i put on my mask.
CHOWS~
You have been graced by MR.VoGue at -1:25 PM-
